Story Telling: Development [Pitch Review]

The overall feedback from today's pitching session was quite relieving. After hearing some positive comments I am feeling a bit more confident about my idea and am excited to start working on it.

Simon praised the simplicity of the idea but suggested that I'm viewing the story from the wrong time and that I should consider setting my story just as the two characters have moved in, instead of planning to move in. Doing this will mean that my characters are actually doing something, instead of talking about doing something.

"Great comedy comes from great drama."

"Don't look to the future; write the future." 

Story Telling: Development [Idea Testing]

Struggling to come up with any ideas that I felt passionate about and hoping to find some inspiration from real life, I began taking notes of the people and lives around me.

CHARACTER	LOCATION
Student	Dinner
Guidance Councillor	Dining Area
New Boyfriend	Reception
Bored Security Guard	Office

People playing bowls - Repetitive circulation of people moving to shoot encourages conversation.

Mother & Son walking – Disagreement over family matter

Boy and girlfriend training dog together

Using these characters etc for inspiration, I began trying to plan an actual story.

Old man and young girl in a laundromat together. Old man gets annoyed at young people always being on their phones etc. She helps him realise that it can be used to connect with friends he hasn’t seen in a long time and he reminds her to look up and not down 24/7.

Two girls trying to get ready for a night out. Blaise has been ready for half an hour and is waiting on Emily, who’s adamant she’s not going anywhere until she’s finished her coursework. Blaise persuades Emily to down a variety of shots to help ‘motivate’ her and the night begins from there.

 ‘I was sitting in a café yesterday and this man comes over and asks if he can sit next to me. I said to him ‘it’s your chair as much as it is mine’ and anyway, we get to talking and he asks me how old I am, so I tell him, I say ‘I just turned 70’. He says he’s 90, ‘you’re still a boy’ he says, ‘I bet you still act like one too.’  - Overheard from a man on a bus.

Conversations of age and life.

Contrast between young and old ideology.

Each generation has something to teach and something to learn.

The secret life of the elderly?

Old couple planning a house party? 

Story Telling: Development [Anthony's Song PITCH] X CANCELLED IDEA X

The Title

Anthony’s Song

A pitch of 25 words or less.

A group of friends plan where they want to live next year. It quickly becomes clear it might not be the best idea.

The genre

Comedy

The two main characters (not just names, but a sense of who they are ie Barry, 67. An overweight retired navel officer with a serious drink problem and love of keeping piegons) Include images of what the character might look like
.

Bill, 21. A music student with a work hard, party harder attitude. He’s in a band and can’t wait to get a place with room to jam in. Looking forward to lazy Sunday’s on a deckchair in their sunny backyard with a beer.

Mike, 20. English Lit student who will attempt to outdrink you quicker than he’ll run to throw up 2 hours later. He wants to find somewhere near a local pub where he can watch footy on weekends.

The main location(S) (doesn't have to be the exact location but representative.) Include images.

Halls of residence kitchen.

The source material - if taken from a factual source. If not, then perhaps the inspiration.

Real life inspiration + idea expansion. [See ‘Development of idea’ post.]

A few extra lines that describe what the complete story is.

After a night out best mates Bill and Mike decide that they should live together after moving out of halls. As the two wait for their kebab to be delivered they begin planning their life together. Perhaps they share a different idea of ‘somewhere over the rainbow’.

Story Telling: Development [Short Story Workshop]

PROMPT:
PRIEST
UNI PROFESSOR
WAREHOUSE

IDEA: Haunted warehouse. Priest to exorcise. Professor for scientific study.
GOAL: Successful exorcism

TITLE: Dock Thirteen.

CHARACTERS:
PRIEST: Priest Osmond
Age- 57
Appearance- portly man with greying hair and weathered face.
Osmond believes it to be the work of the devil.
Traditional beliefs, grew up in the church.

PROFESSOR: Prfsr Charlotte Stevenson
Age- 26
Appearance- short red headed woman
Professor of extraterrestrial studies
Prfsr Stevenson wishes to record solid evidence of paranormal activities.














SETTING:
Abandoned industrial warehouse.





















STORY PLAN:
-Starts with visualised emails and v/o phone call conversations detailing the previous events and setting up the story.
-Stevenson arrives first, seems doubtful and begins to set up equipment.
-Osmond rings to say he's arrived. During conversation, lots of static and interference. Warehouse lights flicker and few pieces of equipment appear to show a figure (Stevenson's back is turned.)
-Osmond arrives and immediately looks down on Stevenson's approach.
-Immediately they hear loud noises and investigate, revealing only mice and wind.
-They wait for a while and nothing happens.
-Begin talking (to pass time) and politely argue religion/science.
-Priest says some prayers as Professor wanders with equipment. measuring spook levels.
-Priest finishes prayer as Professor's equipment shows signs of activity
-Each claim it proves their method
-Argue
-Split up
-Professor triangulates spirit's position and goes to investigate. hears creaking sounds etc and notices suspicious activity. Begins to record proof but equipment becomes damaged.
-Work together to draw out spirit.
-Spirit appears and they agree to exorcise it.
-They defeat the spirit and believe they have won.
-Turn around to see possessed line of school children.
-Lights go out one by one, leaving spotlight on them.
-Each get dragged in opposite direction into darkness.
-END